Toxic behaviours and tonic behaviours
When I’ve been thinking about how we carry ourselves through a day,
the habits we slip into,
the ones that help...
and the ones that don’t.
Some behaviours...
they’re toxic.
They twist things.
They leave a bad taste,
in your gut,
in your relationships,
in your sense of self.
It’s not always the big, loud stuff.
Sometimes it’s quiet...
subtle.
Slow erosion.
Biting your tongue until it bleeds.
Saying “I’m fine” when you’re not.
Doomscrolling at midnight.
Putting everyone else’s needs above your own
like it’s some badge of honour.
And then—
there are the tonic ones.
Behaviours that act like balm.
Small doses of real medicine.
Not for performance.
Not for applause.
But because they help you come back to you.
Like…
Turning your phone off for an hour, or more...
Saying no, even if your voice shakes.
Letting yourself stretch.
Letting yourself feel.
Letting yourself rest.
It’s not about judging yourself.
It’s about noticing.
Tuning in,
and asking...
Is this draining me?
Or feeding me?
Is this behaviour rooted in fear… or in care?
That’s the difference.
That’s the shift.
No need to be perfect.
Just… be honest.
Start there.